Are You a Happy Actor?

As the end of pilot season nears, let's look at some of the common fantasies of being a "successful actor":

• Land a starring role on a TV show
• Turn your TV success into a successful movie career
• Win lots of acting awards
• Become a rich and famous person that is adored by the public

While some of these items might not be on your acting bucket list, many people want these dreams to come true.  Will achieving these dreams make you a happy person?  How can you tell if you're happy as an actor????

Life beyond acting - Acting is a wonderful way to spend the day but some actors become unhappy with their chosen profession because of a lack of outside interests.  If you just focus on the next audition or roles other actors have landed, you will burn yourself out on any enjoyment of your craft.  Venture outside the acting world by volunteering with a charity or playing sports.  Outside interests in Los Angeles help you "get a break" and appreciate the time you spend on acting more than ever.

Watching other actors - As an actor, watching other actors can help determine if you are happy with your chosen profession.  Do you watch another actor with envy since they got a part you really wanted? On the other hand, do you like to discuss the great work they did? The way you view other actors says a lot about your state of mind.

Time for class - What is your reaction when it's time for an acting class? Are you happy to be going to class?  Do you look forward to supporting your classmates?  If not, are you counting the minutes until class is over and dreading the whole experience? If going to acting class is a chore, it might be time to examine the level of passion you have for your acting career.

Is acting still an adventure - Think about the times your family asked you the dreaded question, "When will I see you on TV and/or a movie?"  This question is asked of almost every actor.  You can give a vague answer or share your adventures with them. Tell them funny audition stories. Describe the casting director and let them know how you stood out from others in the room. Share your Hollywood journey with your family and friends.  You are experiencing moments others can only dream about enjoying!

A thankful feeling - While you might not have landed that big part in the next Marvel movie, you did audition for the role.  That's an opportunity thousands of actors did not get to experience. Take the time to appreciate what you've experienced so far in your career. Keeping the highs and lows in perspective helps you enjoy the journey.

While it might seem obvious, it should be said that being miserable is easy but being happy is better for your daily life.

Are you happy and positive about where you're going or are you worried about what you haven't achieved yet? Are you letting the past drag you down?  

The answer to those questions might help you determine the future direction of your acting career.

This actor seems happy with his acting and comedy careers.

The Proof Is In...I Am Not A Jerk!

Spoiler Alert: I'm not exactly a warm and fuzzy person.

It's not that I don't like spending time with others. I just have little use for talking about myself for any length of time.

I like people to tell me what they need/what is on their mind so I will know what needs to be done. Let's get to the point and get moving ASAP.

Having said that, I recently discovered my personality is not as combative as some people believe.

In 2016, I was contacted by Mike Sager. Mike is a journalist who has written for Rolling Stone and Esquire, He is also an author whose articles inspired the feature films "Boogie Nights" and "Wonderland". He discovered my blog and contacted me about doing a feature story on Zach and his Dadager. It seemed like an interesting idea but we could never get our schedules to line up before the idea disappeared into the night.

Fast forward to this year as Mike and I touched base about the story idea. His editor wanted him to come to Los Angeles and interview out family. The story would touch on the journey that led us here as well as what a "Dadager" does for the career of his child/teen actor.

Mike and his film crew spent a weekend with us in September. The whirlwind weekend, filled with an intense interview process, included:

• Mike interviewing Dana and myself over dinner at Jerry's Deli. Dana and I discussed the decision making process behind moving to Los Angeles and what life is like having a teen actor.
• Interviews with Zach as he discussed his reasons for wanting to make acting his career, He also talked about the weird world of being a teenage stand-up comedian in the Los Angeles comedy scene.
• Mike and his crew went with us to The Ice House in Pasadena to film Zach's debut at the club.
• A few interviews, with the three of us together, discussing show business and how it impacts our lives on a daily basis.
• Even Doctor Murgatroyd AKA Doc The Dog got in on the action by insisting on sitting with us during one of the interviews.

The weekend with Mike is the most I've talked about myself/discussed the past in many years. I am not big on reminiscing about the past. I am more interested in the present as well as where I am heading in the future.

The weekend seemed to go well. Mike got a lot of good footage of Zach at The Ice House and some fun interviews at our home with all of us. The time spent looking back helped us focus on the future by examining the goals Zach is trying to achieve with his career/

I can feel your question about the interview...When can you read the feature article about Zach?

Mike put the article together and also made a short film piece containing footage from the comedy club and our interviews at home. He submitted them to his editor and discovered there was not enough drama or conflict in the piece.

In other words, I was not the cliche "evil stage parent" most people think of when it comes to parents of child/teen actors.

To his credit, Mike refused to do a rewrite that would have cast me in a bad light. He could have easily redone the piece to make his editor happy by making me a giant stage parent whose only concern is living off his kid.

The editor wanted a story featuring a stage parent like this guy: http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-lavar-ball-plaschke-20171121-story.html

So, what will happen to the story and the short film?

Mike and his team are shopping the story around and getting some advice from folks in the entertainment industry. I'm not sure what outlet will pick it up and run the story. I will definitely keep you posted in the future.

For now, the initial outcome of this project is proof that I am not as big of a jerk as many believe me to be.

Don't get me wrong...I am kind of a jerk. I'm just not a "stage parent using my kid to live out my show business dreams" jerk.

A feature story about this actor is coming in the near future.

If You Pass This 8 Question Quiz, You're Ready To Be An Actor

The life of an actor is not an easy one. It looks glamorous from the outside since most people only think about the actual process of acting on a film or TV set. They don't think about the amount of time spent at auditions, the money that goes into acting classes and headshots and the (sometimes) negative feedback from others.

Are you interested in becoming a professional actor? If so, take this quiz to see if acting is the right career choice for you!

Are you okay with not knowing where your next paycheck is coming from or when you will have another paycheck? 
For most actors, consistent work is not something that normally happens. If you are looking for a steady paycheck, this might not be the job for you.


Do you like being rejected on a regular basis?
You don't hear back from a casting director if you don't book a job. You either don't hear anything or you see an announcement online about the actor that landed the part you hoped to book.  If you can't handle the constant rejection when it comes to booking acting roles, you might consider another line of work.


Are you willing to make the choice between paying for headshots and acting classes instead of essential items?
Sometimes actors have to make the choice between paying for items crucial to their chosen profession (such as acting classes and headshots) or buying a new couch or new tires for their car. If you would rather spend any extra money you have on advancing your career, you might be suited for the acting world.

Are you okay with being judged on your physical appearance?
There are many times that the final decision for a role is not based on your acting ability. The casting director is often trying to "mix and match" actors in order to achieve a certain look among the characters. You might be too tall or too small for what the casting folks have in mind. You might have too much hair or not enough hair. You might look more like a brother or sister than the possible love interest of the other actor or actress. Being judged on your looks is a big part of the audition process and you have to accept that fact if you want to make it as an actor.

Can you handle criticism?
It is the job of casting directors as well as producers and the director on set to give you feedback about your work. If you are the type of person who thinks that every choice you make is the right one at all times, you either have to learn to accept criticism or find a line of work where nobody will give you any sort of guidance or direction. I don't know if such a job exists but maybe you can find it.

Are you prepared to disappoint your family and friends?
No matter how much you plan ahead, there will be a time when your manager or agent calls with a last minute audition or booking. Actors often have to miss dinners, birthdays and holiday trips home because of the last minute nature of the industry. There will be many times that your family and friends will be upset with you and discourage your choice of such an unpredictable career. Being an actor means giving up precious time with them as you follow your dreams.

Does the thought of your friends living a normal life make you jealous?
Hopefully, you will be happy seeing your friends get married, have a steady job and buy a house where they will raise a family. Does the thought of having a "normal life" make you jealous or does it not seem appealing at all? If seeing your friends raise a family while having a regular job makes you jealous, you might not be cut out for the life of an actor.

Is acting the only career choice that makes you happy?
If the thought of being an actor makes you smile and brings you happiness, you have made the right choice so get out there and kick some acting butt!

How did you do on the quiz?

If you scored 7 or 8 points, you are ready to live the life of an actor.
If you scored 5 or 6 points, you might want to think twice before moving to Los Angeles.
If you scored 4 (or below) points, stay home because the uncertain life of an actor is not for you.

This actor is still working hard to succeed in Hollywood.

An Overnight Hospital Adventure

We had an interesting weekend as Dana ended up at the emergency room on Saturday night/Sunday morning due to intense pain. It's become a joke in our family that something always happens in March that requires her to have surgery.  It is now March so (of course) we ended up at the hospital.

We arrived around 1AM and I let her out at the front door so she wouldn't have to walk from the parking lot. I parked the car and was approached by the security patrol. They started asking me all about my exciting night. I had no idea what they were talking about but they whooped loudly, gave me a high five and left to bother other people. I saw a security guard as I entered the building and mentioned that my wife had just walked in the door. Before I could ask how to get to the emergency room, he pointed down the hallway and sent me on my way. I went down the hallway where a nurse grabbed me before I could say anything. She told me my wife was upstairs and put me on an elevator. When I exited the elevator, I found myself in a maternity ward. Two nurses approached me so I could see my wife before the baby was born. I explained my situation and they seemed disappointed in me after they realized I wasn't there to be a new father. I reminded them there was a guy somewhere in the building looking for his wife and maybe they should go find him. They ran off to look for the dad and I went off in search of the emergency room.

I finally found Dana as she was being admitted to a room. She put on her patient gown and went to the bathroom to give a urine sample. I waited in the room as a "Code Gray" came over the intercom. "Code Gray" means there is a combative person that needs to be calmed down or restrained. I could hear a woman loudly yelling that "they didn't know what she had been through", "she doesn't like to be tied down" and "she'll kick people in places they didn't know they had on their bodies". Dana missed all of this because the combative person was restrained by the time she got out of the bathroom.

The rooms started filling up as the night continued. The guy next to us had to be a cocaine addict. His nose was bleeding everywhere because "he hurt his nose and had to put some packing in it". When asked which side of his nose he hurt, he replied with the left side. Five minutes later, it was the right side. Wait, maybe it was the left side. At one point, the doctor asked him "Do you have any idea if you actually hurt your nose or can I have the real story?" I do know the guy was the biggest wimp in the world as he yelled for the nurse every 10 minutes because "he was hurting".

While Dana had x-rays and various tests throughout the night, there were more all star patients entering the emergency room arena:

• The guy telling a long winded story about the 3 times he was struck by a car
• The patient who lost a finger or two in a combine accident
• The person who swallowed a goldfish belonging to a neighbor before coughing up blood
• The rocket scientist who fell off the back of a truck while sitting on a washing machine (his brother didn't have ropes so he was sitting on the machine so it wouldn't move)
• One guy who kept saying the words "California Chicken Wrap" in relation to his emergency but was unable to give more details

My favorite person was actually not in the emergency room. I went to the cafeteria around 4AM to get a snack and some caffeine. I walked in to find a guy standing all alone in front of the vending machines. He was yelling at the soda machine for taking his money, the snack machine for talking back to him and the coffee machine for being a "demon filled with the hot liquid that the wicked and unjust will get after death". He turned around and looked at me in silence. I calmly said it looked like he was having a moment with the machines and I would come back after he was done showing them the error of their ways. I calmly turned around and swiftly made my way back to the emergency room.

Dana was discharged at 7AM and we still don't have a definitive answer to her March medical mystery. Any good thoughts you can send her way would be greatly appreciated. Also, let me know if you have any idea how a California Chicken Wrap can result in a trip to the emergency room.

This actor stayed home to keep the dog calm while mom was at the hospital.

It's The Most Tolerable Time Of The Year

It's the middle of December and there seems to be a change in the air. Traffic isn't as bad as normal and auditions are slowing down. That can only mean one thing:

Welcome to the holidays in Hollywood.

Even though we've had an abundance of 70-degree days and sunshine (until the rain event on Thursday night), there are fewer people around town to enjoy it.

Question: Why do so many people leave town during the holidays?

Answer: Many actors move here to break into the entertainment industry so they go back home to see family and friends during the holidays.

The entertainment industry slows down as 2017 grow closer on the calendar. The week between Christmas and New Year's Day is really the one time of year actors can leave Los Angeles without being afraid they will miss an audition or booking a job. When Zach and I lived here before Dana moved to California, we would visit her as much as possible. There were many times I would get a call from a casting director asking if Zach could work a job for them. Of course, the job would always be the next day. It would never be next week or next month. It would always be the next day. No matter how far ahead we planned our trip while letting as many people as possible know that we would be out of town, there always seemed to be someone who needed Zach to work the day after we left town.

However, this is the time of year that the entire industry starts to shut down With few productions, auditions and workshops going on during this time period, actors can leave town without the fear of missing a gig.

It's also the time of year that reminds me that many people still consider somewhere else to be their home. As I write this entry, Zach is eating with one of his friends who is leaving town for 3 months to see family and friends. Many actors that leave town in December don't come back until February when pilot season is happening. They stay home to save money as well as see their loved ones.

It's not easy living in Hollywood away from your family. The people in California miss their family as well as the joy of being home. The people back home don't see their family that often and they also miss being involved in the daily lives of those chasing an acting dream.

We were a "split family" for a little under a year until Dana landed a job in Los Angeles. We've left town to visit family but we (thankfully) live together in Los Angeles.

Even though Christmas is around the corner, there are still some folks not in the holiday mood. I had the crosswalk signal in my favor the other day as I was walking to the gym. I started to cross the intersection when a van driven by a lady who looked like Mrs. Claus decided to stop waiting on me so she turned at the light. She zoomed past while barely missing me and then flipped me off as she drove away to her destination.

All I could think was, "If I get hit by the wife of Santa Claus, does she get a pass on the naughty or nice list?"

I'm looking forward to a fun holiday with this actor.

It's Almost Like A Billy Joel Song!

Billy Joel has a famous song called "Say Goodbye to Hollywood" (which has much less rage and angst than "Say Goodbye Hollywood" by Eminem) that first came out in 1976. Forty years after that song was released, our family is staying in Hollywood and officially saying goodbye to Missouri.

I can hear you asking, "Haven't you been away from Missouri for four years already? Why are you just getting around to saying goodbye?"

The answer is....We finally sold our home in St. Louis.

I've mentioned before that Zach and I moved to Los Angeles in January 2012. We put our house on the market but we were in no great hurry to sell it because the two of us would go back to Missouri if he didn't like trying to be an actor. It quickly became apparent that Zach had a future out here so we decided to seriously try and sell the house. While the "serious selling" was just starting to kick into gear, Dana landed a job with the American Cancer Society and had to be in California in two weeks. This left us no time to handle the necessary landscaping, painting and repairs that normally need to be done to any home to make it "seller friendly". Instead, we decided to use the home as a rental property so we could get the monthly mortgage covered and not have to pay both California rent and a Missouri house payment.

We were pretty lucky with our renters most of the time. We had one family rent it while they were repairing storm damage to their home that turned into eight months worth of rent as their repairs went on longer than expected. We also had a series of families that were temporary Missouri residents while their husbands were doing their medical residencies at Washington University. All of the families took care of the property and seemed to care about keeping it in good shape.

However, there were a few bumps along the way.

Here's a fun fact for you: If your home in the state of Missouri sustains water damage while the house is being used as a rental property, your homeowners insurance will not cover any of the damage. Let me repeat that for you: NONE OF THE DAMAGE!!!! After our last rental family failed to check the sump pump in the basement (to the tune of $6000 worth of out of pocket water damage repair expenses), we decided it was time to finally sell the house.

The ease of owning a rental property is often related to how easy it is to reach the property in times of need. When we first moved to St. Louis, we still owned a home in Memphis. In the 4-5 months it took us to sell that home, I would go check on it and take care of the yard and any small repairs. I also worked at a country radio station so my trips to Memphis would often go like this:

• Get off the air at Midnight in St. Louis
• Drive 4 hours to Memphis
• Take a sleeping bag and crash on the floor of the empty house for 3-4 hours
• Get up at 8am and take care of any pressing issues
• Leave by 1pm to drive back to St. Louis to be on the air at 7pm

Does that sound like a pain to you? Yes, it was a pain but at least I was close enough to drive there and take care of any issues that needed to be handled at the house. Using the water damage example again, I couldn't exactly jump in the truck and go take care of it because it would have taken me two days to get to Missouri. We were lucky enough to have a great rental property company watching after our home. Greg Rybacki, and the entire team at Rybo Properties, found the people to get the water out of the basement and fix the entire mess for the lowest price possible. Greg also watched over the whole project and made sure it was taken care of correctly and on time. I can't praise the guy enough for taking care of us over the past four years. 

When we made the final decision to sell the house, we turned to an old friend who would have our best interests at heart. Joanne Balis put up with way too many questions from me as well as a couple that flaked out on the first contract we had on the house this year. After that disappointment, she found the perfect couple to buy the property from us.  

When we made the decision to sell the house, I emailed some friends in St. Louis asking their advice and recommendations about painting and landscaping. I sent the email asking this question at 1am California time. At 8am California time, I woke up to a message from Mark Seibel asking me to call him. Mark runs a stone, paving and concrete company and instantly went over to my house when he got the email. He had already taken photos of the property and had a plan of what to do around the house. Zach and his son have remained friends over the years and I am glad to say that Mark and I are still friends. He went far beyond what my simple advice email asked and I can't thank him enough. Plus, I love the fact that he made his son mow our yard for free the entire time it was on the market.

I haven't set foot in the house since 2012. I drove past it a few times when I was in town but that was just to check on the outside of the home and to make sure the property was being cared for by the renters. It long ago stopped being a home to me and was just a piece of property that I owned. It's only been in the last week that I've actually started to feel some nostalgia for the place. The sale closed yesterday so I'd like to say goodbye to:

• Ken - The neighbor we never saw and only knew was alive when the pizza delivery guy would show up at his door.
• Miss Norma - The widowed neighbor who was always nice to Zach and snippy with me.
• The homeowner next door - Thanks for showing me the kind of people I would never let rent my house.
• The neighbor on the other side of the house - I don't remember her name but I do remember her dislike for everyone else in the neighborhood. I think I sealed her hatred for me when I was playing with my dog and she came out to complain that the dog was barking too much. I replied with "Would you like me to teach her how to moo or meow? It would be a great trick and might not hurt your delicate ears so much." She had no use for me after that moment.
• The neighbors with the live chickens in their backyard - I'm pretty sure they were running drugs out of their home but they were low key about it.

Unlike Billy Joel, we will keep saying "Hello to Hollywood". I may not live in a big house in Los Angeles but at least I don't have a home in St. Louis anymore to give me constant worries about flooding and tornadoes and whether or not the renters are taking care of the place.

Having said all of that, I certainly wouldn't mind an order of toasted ravioli from St. Louis!

This actor is in Hollywood for the long run.

Are You Ready To Laugh In August?

Zach recently did his first gig in the main room at Flappers in Burbank. He was pleasantly surprised to find a dozen teenagers and a table full of adults in the audience to support him that night. I think the only person not happy about the crowd was the headliners as he remarked a few times that the millennials in the crowd were not getting some of his jokes. He was a good sport about it but you could tell he didn't know what to make of the teenagers.

It was a good gig for Zach because he did a mix of new and old material. He has to write a lot of new material in the next few weeks because we just received his bookings for the Burbank Comedy Festival. Zach is performing three sets that week and he is one of the youngest performers booked for the event. The Festival receives hundreds of entries each year and one of the main goals of performing is to make it into one of the "Best of the Fest" shows on the final night of the Festival. Those shows are attended by comedy bookers across the country and serve as an industry showcase for the comedians that are part of the "best of" shows.

The performers are a mixture of household names, seasoned road comics and people trying to make a name in the comedy world. If you're in the Burbank area the week of August 14th, you can catch Zach during the following shows:

http://flapperscomedy.com/booking/h2f_flyer.php?id=40569

http://flapperscomedy.com/booking/h2f_flyer.php?id=40563

http://flapperscomedy.com/booking/h2f_flyer.php?id=40619

While he is preparing for his week of shows, he is still busy with auditions. He went straight to callback yesterday so keep thinking good thoughts for him for that one. He is busy enough between acting, auditions, improv and hanging with his friends that he always has new sources of material. His friends might not realize they are providing him with material but they will discover it when he is talking about their adventures during his shows.

I just realized I should keep my mouth shut for the next few weeks or I will end up being part of his set as well.  Shutting up now!

New photos of Zach are now on his IMDb page. Check them out when you have a moment.

Where Were You Four Years Ago?

I can still remember the feeling of change in the air in January of 2012. I was spending my time taking care of business and school related odds and ends as Zach and I prepared to head to California. 

My time was also filled with Internet research trying to find an apartment while not knowing anything about the various cities in the Los Angeles area, touching base with friends before departing, making sure my truck was ready for the drive and trying to determine how many of our belongings could fit in my truck and still be a comfortable drive to California. We had to take a good amount of Zach’s clothes since he would have auditions and other acting events. I took some jeans, about ten shirts, some sneakers, socks and underwear. I figured I could buy anything else I needed once we got to California. We also packed a TV, Zach’s Xbox 360, pots, pans and our computer.

The afternoon of January 19^th, 2012 was a bittersweet one for us.  It was Zach’s last day at school and I went to pick him up as usual. I didn't say much to any of the parents that I visited with each afternoon because I didn't feel like having a long conversation about our plans. Zach came outside about ten minutes after school ended with a look that was a combination of sadness and excitement. The idea that we were going to California the next day hit him at that moment. We were excited but nervous at the same time. His friends were coming over to our house that afternoon but Zach still had one more task before leaving school. We went back inside so he could (as a joke) put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on his locker until he returned to school.

Think about how you feel on Sunday night once you realize you have to go to bed because of work the next morning. There is always a feeling of dread about the next day. I didn't feel a sense of dread because I didn't want to go to California. I was dreading the road trip that I was about to undertake in the morning. 

Dana, Zach and I hit the road at 5am on January 20th as a light dusting of snow fell over St. Louis. I took the snow as a sign to get the heck out of town! Dana took a week of vacation to drive with us and help us get settled. She needed to make sure her family was safe in California.

We made good time the first day as we went from Missouri to Oklahoma to Texas to New Mexico. We spent the night somewhere in New Mexico because the combination of high winds, winding roads and UFO talk made us ready to rest for the night. We hit the road again on Sunday around 8am and went from New Mexico to Arizona to California as we finally arrived in Los Angeles. 

We left at 5am on the 20^th and got to our hotel in Universal City at 10pm on the 21^st. Our drive across the country included stops in Tulsa, Amarillo, the car museum at Russell’s Truck & Travel Center in New Mexico (3 miles from the Texas/New Mexico state line), a hotel stay somewhere in New Mexico, fast food in Albuquerque and our arrival in California. 

After a week, Dana went back home and we settled into our new routine of being apart for what we thought would be about six months before heading back to Missouri. Dana and I were pretty sure that the lure of football season and his friends would make Zach want to go back to Missouri.

That's what we get for thinking we had any idea what the future held for our family! 

Here's to four years of Hollywood, child actors, stage parents, porn king neighbors, a cross country family relationship, a TIA stroke, agents, managers, making new (and good) friends, a near death hospital experience, family visiting us in California, blogs, casting directors, Disney, Nickelodeon, improv, making a life in California, Russian cell phone kings, high school graduation, sky poison (rain) sending the California natives into a panic, filming television shows and movies in Los Angeles as well as Missouri and Oregon, a series of freelance gigs that have found me working with people in the entertainment/physical fitness/life insurance/crowdfunding/spices/public relations/social media management/plastic surgery industries, theme parks, college, baseball, traffic, learning our way around Los Angeles and the three of us living in the same city again.

There hasn't been a dull moment since we arrived in California. I can't wait to see what the next year brings for all of us.

This Actor Explored Los Angeles With Me After We Moved Here.