- Is your cat turning your life upside down? Our expert cat behaviorist never met a cat he couldn't help! Let us transform your ferocious feline back into a cool cat.
- Seeking interesting couples at the breaking point. Ready to get divorced? We'll pay each couple $570 to tell their story on TV. Must have nice smile and full set of teeth.
- Love the Dodgers and hate the Giants? Broken off relationships because your loved one loved the Giants more than you? Tell us your story and you might be featured on our show. (Must know baseball terms and teams)
- Are you American but can fake a Russian accent? Are you also an experienced chef? If so, get ready to cook while fooling actual Russian customers. (Must be ready to defend your cooking to angry customers)
- Casting female rappers for a reality show about your struggle for success. Long rap sheets and/or prison record will be discussed in person with producers.
- What do you eat and drink that is strange or shocking? Do you enjoy wood, foam, perfume or dog food? Let us know your odd snack of choice!
- Do you dance like you have two left feet even though you're missing a leg? Learn to dance with only one leg in front of a live audience.
- Overworked? Undervalued? At the end of your rope? Quit your job in the most spectacular fashion possible on TV! (Producers not responsible for finding you a new job)
- Addicted to plastic surgery on your loved one? Hate the thought of going under the knife yourself but don't mind if your spouse completely changes their look? Tell us why you're a cosmetic surgery chicken!
- Have a teenage child but you're only in your 20s or early 30s? Feel like your teen is more of an adult than you? Like to party with the teens even though your kid hates it? We want to hear the craziest story involving you and your teenage posse! (Story must not involve sex with a minor)
I feel bad for you if any of the above casting calls fit your life but I wish you good luck being a reality television star!
No comments:
Post a Comment